


Mugunghwa

by yoake_no_sora



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-15 08:14:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28560390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yoake_no_sora/pseuds/yoake_no_sora
Summary: At twenty-three, Lu Han was told to expect to finally meet his soulmate. But what was the use when his heart still belonged to another?
Relationships: Lu Han/Oh Sehun
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20
Collections: Jinglebellselu's Third Christmas





	Mugunghwa

Lu Han’s eyes caught green and his heart stuttered traitorously in his chest.

Behind him, an impatient businessman cleared his throat and pointedly stared at the gap between him and the subway door. Lu Han shook himself from his stupor and moved out of the way with a mumbled apology though his eyes were already straying back to the subway car behind him, trying to chase any trace of a green bomber jacket or black cap. In the midst of early morning rush hour, the search was futile. Soon, the subway chime rang out once more, the doors sliding shut punctually at its prompting, and Lu Han returned to his previous spot by the door with a sigh.

 _Must have been my imagination. Bomber jackets are trendy anyway so it was probably someone else._ He berated himself internally, half trying to convince himself because he knew the alternative was admitting that he was still lingering on distant memories. _Besides, it’s been years. He probably isn’t wearing that anymore…_ He stifled a chuckle when the stray thought of _No, he totally would_ crossed his mind, but immediately stopped when he realised the dangerous path his thoughts were drifting toward.

He stared at his reflection on the subway doors, the tired eyes greeting him burdened with exhaustion caused by more than the lack of caffeine in his system, then tipped his gaze down to his phone screen. His mother’s last text message — _Xiao Lu! Remember Mrs. Tang’s son? He finally found his One after so long! I’m sure you’ll do much better when your time comes._ — stared at him mockingly.

It was the latest in the barrage of neighbourhood gossip about the marriage prospects of her various acquaintances’ children — half of whom he barely remembered, and the other half he’d never even met — which had assaulted his phone in the advent of his twenty-third birthday. _The birthday._ He mentally cringed at the thought. The message was loud and clear: when he inevitably received his prophetic dream about his fated partner on his birthday, he was to find them right away and get married.

 _Unfortunately, mother_ , he thought sardonically, pocketing his phone with a little more force than was necessary as his stop approached. He stared blankly at the passing blur of colourful advertisements lining the station corridor, picturing shy smiles hidden behind downturned baseball caps instead. _Your son doesn’t believe in love, much less soulmates, anymore._

-

The warm buzz of alcohol in his veins coaxed Lu Han to slump lazily in his seat, his chin tilting precariously on the heel of his palm as he laughed along with Jongdae and Zitao. The orange glow of the fluorescent lamp hanging overhead, which dyed his silver hair in golden hues, seemed to intensify the shade of red blossoming on Taeyong’s face from across the table. The indistinguishable thrum of conversation of the bar’s Friday night patrons and the thudding bass of music in the background just nearly drowned out another peal of Jongdae’s piercing laughter.

Feeling a little sorry for his new intern, especially since this was supposed to be his welcome party, Lu Han pushed a glass of water in Taeyong’s direction and tutted at the other two. “Come on, guys. Give the kid a break.” Taeyong accepted the glass with grateful eyes, immediately hiding his embarrassment by taking a large gulp from it.

“The only break he needs to catch is with Seulgi from the accounting department.” Zitao snickered behind his hand, failing to hide his catlike smirk behind it, though Lu Han doubted he was even really trying.

Taeyong promptly choked on his water and Lu Han scurried to pat him in the back, almost knocking over a plate of chicken wings in his haste, lest he lose his first ever intern to Zitao and Jongdae’s infamous double-teaming. Kris, their stern-eyed manager who had recently been recruited from overseas, wouldn’t be pleased with that. He glowered at the twin eyesmiles of the pair and grumbled under his breath. He knew he should’ve rescheduled to a day the others were free, but the reservations were already made and, with his mother’s new text messages heavy on his mind, Lu Han frankly needed this more than Taeyong did. He gave the younger man’s back a soothing pat, silently apologizing for his selfishness.

“All right, all right.” Jongdae acquiesced as he popped a piece of soondae into his mouth. His eyes landed on Lu Han instead, eyes disappearing into mischievous crescents, and Lu Han practically saw the evil glint in his eyes when his lips pulled up at the corners. As if on cue, Zitao mirrored the grin from his other side.

He definitely shouldn’t have brought these two with him.

“How about you, hyung? Your birthday’s just around the corner. When are we going to meet Mr. Lu?”

“My dad’s in China. Feel free to book a flight whenever you want.” Lu Han responded in what he hoped was a blasé manner but there was a reason the marketing department’s _Cat & Fox duo_ were infamous in their company. Already, he could see the gears in Zitao’s head turn behind his sickeningly sweet smile.

Zitao took a languid sip of his fruity cocktail. “I guess it’s no use finding out who your soulmate is when your heart still belongs to another, huh?”

Lu Han tried to school his expression but a quick sweep across the table — at the wicked smirks of the duo and at Taeyong’s pitying puppy eyes — told him that he was doomed. Before he could even dismiss Zitao’s statement, the man shook his head with a raise of his brow. “No point lying about it. Yixing-ge told me the last time we went drinking that you haven’t had a boyfriend since university.” In his head, Lu Han swore that if he ever got a chance to turn back time, he would convince himself to stay in China instead of accepting Yixing’s recommendation to join him at his new job after graduation.

In a desperate bid to change topics, Lu Han cleared his throat, “B-but what about you, Jongdae? You’re still dating Liyin, aren’t you? What if she’s not the one in your dream?”

To his surprise, Jongdae merely chuckled in response. “I’m not worried.” He said simply, smile softening. “I don’t want to be ruled by some weird dream telling me who I should be with. I make my own decisions for everything else, so why should I leave the most important decision of my life to some abstract fate?” Seeing the awed faces of his companions, he let out an uncharacteristically embarrassed laugh. “Well, that’s how I feel anyway. I’m going to propose to her on my 23rd birthday — show her she means more to me than any supposed soulmate ever would.”

“Hyung,” Taeyong’s eyes shone with unbridled admiration, momentarily forgetting the teasing he’d been subjected to just moments before. “You’re so cool.”

Jongdae puffed out his chest, practically glowing as he pushed back his hair in what was obviously intended to be a suave manner. “That’s right, you should follow this hyung and _just maybe_ Seulgi will go out with you.” Taeyong’s blush returned with a vengeance.

As the pair continued to tease Taeyong, Lu Han quietly slipped away to pay their bill, feeling a little more sober from Jongdae’s speech. He’d let them off just this once for that.

Once he had finished his transaction, stopping by the toilet on the way back to freshen up so the journey back home would entail as few stares as possible (he had already been teased in front of his intern; he needed to save at least some of his remaining dignity), he found the narrow hallways more crowded than they had been a few minutes earlier. He checked his watch, realising that it was later than he originally thought, and began to squeeze his way back so he could send his co-workers off like a responsible hyung.

“Ouc- wait… Lu Han?”

Lu Han almost tripped on his own feet, the alcohol-induced flush of his cheeks draining from his face instantaneously. No matter how long it had been, he’d never forget that voice. He’d tried.

‘No.’ He thought with a curse at the tip of his tongue. ‘No, no, no, no, no.’’

At that instant, by the will of some gracious god or an overly generous wallet by the look of the empty soju bottles littering the vicinity, a large man had emerged from a nearby booth, intent on barrelling his way toward the toilets. With a whispered litany of thanks to every deity he could think of, Lu Han ducked into the crowd once more to rush back to his companions, dumped a wad of cash onto the table for their fares home with only a frenzied apology and farewell in response to their confused stares, and bolted out the door.

When he was in the safety of the bus he had managed to catch a few blocks over from where he was supposed to, heart still hammering against his chest, he allowed his face to crumple behind his palms. Any excuse or argument his brain supplied in a vain attempt to convince himself that any lingering emotions he had were of anger and resentment were drowned out by the insistent beating of his heart.

-

After a weekend of battling with himself about whether to call in sick or not, he was finally convinced by Yixing, who had been informed by a worried Zitao of his bizarre departure, that he had social obligations to fulfill and not to give Zitao any cause for worry. Lu Han decided to spare his friend the reason for his actions to save himself further lectures about moving on from the past, and begrudgingly dragged himself to work the following Monday to be a proper adult. The concerned puppy eyes on Taeyong’s face when he walked in, with a quiet “Are you feeling better, hyung?”, made him feel guilty for thinking about leaving his poor intern all alone.

Wrapping an arm around Taeyong’s shoulders, Lu Han patted his head with a nod. “Yes, I’m fine. Sorry for leaving you with those two…”

“Oh, hey, Lu Han-ge! How was the diarrhea?”

Sputtering, Lu Han rounded on Zitao’s retreating figure, covering Taeyong’s ears lest Zitao poisoned the poor boy’s innocence. “Who said anything about-?! You’d better not go around saying that to people!” The only response he got was a devilish laugh. Somehow it was hard to believe that this was the same person who had reportedly called Yixing out of concern.

Jongdae, who had just emerged from the lounge with a steaming cup of coffee, smiled at him all too serenely. “Oh, it’s too late for that.”

“ _Kim Jongdae!_ ” He swore he felt his blood pressure rise as the newfound respect he had for Jongdae evaporated with each innocent bat of his eyelashes over his coffee cup. Maybe it wasn’t too late to ask for a transfer.

“It’s okay, hyung” Taeyong had taken Lu Han’s hands off his ears and was now clasping them in his own, eyes radiating with pure sincerity as he spoke. “My mom gave me a herbal tea that’s supposed to be good for upset stomachs. I can share it with you?”

Lu Han wanted to cry.

“Lu Han.”

The said man lifted his teary eyes to the towering blond beckoning him in the distance and ushered the intern back to his desk with a sigh. He could only hope that the frown on Kris’s face had nothing to do with the hell duo’s antics, but it was hard to tell with Kris’s resting angry face. He hurried over obediently, not wanting to give him another reason for his frown.

“Lu Han, if I’m not mistaken, you’re assigned to the team working with K-Café Group, _yes_?” Kris had a habit of occasionally mixing English words in his sentences when he spoke, probably on account of Korean being his third or fourth — Lu Han forgot — language. While it was usually not too hard to decipher what he wanted to say, it did sometimes feel like a spontaneous English test whenever they had a conversation. “We’ve decided to switch the _leader_ for this project from Taemin to you. Taemin will focus on the other _projects_ he’s involved in. I think this will be a great opportunity of _growth_ for you since you’ve already prepared the proposal and lined up the vendors for today’s meeting. I’m sure everything will be _fine_.”

Lu Han’s jaw dropped before he could stop himself. Kris was right that it was an amazing opportunity to be able to work with an up-and-coming coffee franchise like the K-Café group — perhaps too amazing for a junior associate like him. It was a bigger project than any other he’d been involved in and he had been counting on the more experienced Taemin to help him through it.

_Figures today would be the day Mr. Lee “Workaholic” Taemin decides to actually rest a little._

Before he could formulate any sentences short of begging Kris to drag his former teammate back, the man clapped his hands together with a booming “Ah, just the people we were waiting for!”, and jolted Lu Han from his thoughts. He resigned himself to his fate and, donning his best customer service smile, turned around to greet their new guests... Only to find that the figure before him was one all too familiar — as if he’d just stepped out of one of his memories, out of baggy bomber jackets and into starched suits.

“Nice to m- Lu Han?”

Lu Han felt his smile falter when the familiar hooded eyes met his for an electrifying second.

He had imagined this moment a thousand times, especially when they had first parted, with far too many regrets and pain between them, but he had never actually thought they would ever meet again. (That, admittedly, had been because he had tried very hard to avoid him, even to the extent of transferring to a university in China soon after before being lured back to Korea by Yixing.) The many scenarios he had dreamt up, involving much more confidence and well-rehearsed one-liners on his part, seemed laughable now when panic gripped at his throat and words evaporated from his lips. Then again, in all those scenarios, he’d convinced himself that he’d be over Sehun by then. But the present reality couldn’t be further from the truth.

He blinked, willing away shadows of messy rainbow-coloured tresses and cheeks rounded by youth he could still picture despite the dark coiffed hair and sharp jawline of the man standing before him, and heard himself say, “Sehun. It’s been a while.”

The presence of the man next to Sehun, whose perfectly styled hair and refined air uncannily resembled depictions of chaebols on television, only registered in Lu Han’s brain when he inquired with some surprise, “Sehun, you know each other?” The man, who he now recognized as K-Café Group’s Kim Joonmyun, looked understandably confused by the exchange but the polite smile on his face never wavered.

With some difficulty, Lu Han wrenched his eyes away from Sehun’s inexplicably gentle gaze and gave the other man a quick nod. “We knew each other in university. We were in a Chinese language exchange group in our first year.” Lu Han explained politely, ignoring the minute twitch of Sehun’s eyebrow.

Sehun added with an ease that Lu Han both hated and envied, “Yes, he had the misfortune of having to hear me fumble over basic Mandarin. We actually met a little before that too… I don’t think Lu Han remembers but I’m not very memorable. On the other hand, Lu Han’s a face you’d never forget.”

This time, Lu Han’s brow raised in askance but all he got was an insufferably bright smile and Joonmyun’s elated, “And to think that you’re meeting again coincidentally a third time! Looks like our partnership was made to be.”

Next to Lu Han, Kris agreed with a wide grin he only reserved for clients; he could already see the dollar signs in the flash of his manager’s eyes. “I agree. Why don’t we get the ball rolling and continue this discussion in the conference room? Lu Han, if you could gather the others and meet us there?” Lu Han nodded eagerly, desperate to get away, and waited until they had turned the corner before jogging away to their department offices.

Once he reached his desk, he collapsed on his chair with a groan. He ignored the disapproving stare he was sure Yuri was giving him from the other cubicle and willed the ground to swallow him whole.

“Minseok, please kill me.”

Minseok only peeked over the divider separating his cubicle from Lu Han’s, barely able to stare down at the man planting his face on top of the stack of binders he was meant to bring to the meeting, with unconcealed disinterest. “Sounds like too much work. I’ll pass.”

“You are such a great friend.” Minseok responded to his glare with a thumbs up though only his thumb was visible over the divider. “...Do you think it’s too late to request a transfer?”

Minseok rolled his eyes, finally deciding to drag his whiny coworker from his chair. “Enough of your drama. Let’s go to the meeting. I already told Taeyong to bring some tea and Luna is already hooking the laptop up to the projector, so we shouldn’t keep them waiting.” He paused a moment and muttered, mostly to himself, “Though maybe it would be best to serve coffee to coffee shop employees… Ah, whatever. Let’s go.”

Thinking of exactly who would be there waiting, Lu Han was sorely tempted to let them wait forever but sighed as he allowed the other man to pull him up.

The meeting, to Lu Han’s relief, ended without any major issue other than the usual struggle with the AV equipment at the start. He was certain he’d only managed to get through it thanks to Luna fielding questions and the fact that he had mainly directed his presentation to just Joonmyun when he spoke. Even at that moment, while Lu Han was celebrating his accomplishment with a discrete exchange of thumbs ups with his teammates as they put away the concept documents and unplugged the laptop, he was evading Sehun’s general direction. It was difficult, however, when he could practically feel Sehun’s stare burning into him the entire time.

 _It’s fine. Once this is done, I’ll probably only have to deal with Joonmyun anyway._ Lu Han consoled himself as he stole a glance in Joonmyun’s direction, hiding a smile when he overheard him and Kris already beginning to discuss budgeting. _Or I could put in that transfer request. It_ would _be nice not to have to deal with Zitao and Jongdae._

“Sounds great!” Joonmyun was saying as he stood from his seat. “I’ll ask Sehun to send Lu Han the revised contract then they can review the marketing strategy for the new branches since Sehun will be taking over this project.”

Lu Han swore he saw Sehun stifle a laugh when he dropped the binder he was holding on his foot.

Before Lu Han could even recover from the shock, Joonmyun continued with a friendly smile, blissfully unaware of the despair his words inflicted. “Actually, we’re celebrating Sehun’s birthday tonight at one of our new cafés. Kind of a soft-opening for just our management team. Why don’t you all come along? It would be the perfect opportunity for you to get acquainted with our franchise. And Lu Han can get caught up with Sehun; I’m sure you two have a lot to talk about.”

If Joonmyun’s earlier words had startled him, now Lu Han was stunned. He had forced himself, with mixed success, to erase any memories he had shared with Sehun when their relationship had fallen apart, but being presented now with the reminder that it was Sehun’s birthday — and his twenty-third birthday at that — made a multitude of thoughts and emotions flood his mind. In the midst of all that, morbid curiosity and the inevitable question of who he saw in his dream — of which unknown stranger had taken the last lingering spark of hope to return to Sehun’s side — surfaced through the haze of thoughts, threatening to break any semblance of calm he still held.

While Kris was enthusiastically agreeing to the proposition, momentarily abandoning Korean entirely as he exclaimed “ _That’s a great idea!_ ” to an amused Joonmyun, Lu Han stole a glance at Sehun, who had been quietly nodding in assent to his superior’s suggestion. Noticing his gaze, Sehun turned to Lu Han with a frustratingly dazzling smile of his own.

“Yes, it would be nice if you could come.” Sehun reiterated, waving one of Lu Han’s business cards that Taeyong had dutifully passed around at the start of the meeting. “I’ll send you the details.”

“I’ll have to double-check… I think I already have plans.” Lu Han lied. “And I haven’t been feeling well this morning.” The half-lie he’d added for extra measure drew a small noise from Taeyong in the background that almost made Lu Han laugh if not for the erratic pounding of his heart.

“I’ll send you the details anyway. Just in case.” He turned to grin at the others, almost as an afterthought by the way his eyes lingered on Lu Han’s a beat too long. “I hope to see you all there.” Luna, in particular, assured him that they were all very happy to attend.

 _Ah, fuck_ , Lu Han thought as their visitors left. Taeyong had already begun impressing on him the effectiveness of his mother’s tea as he braced himself for the imminent descent of Kris’s gaze on him and Luna’s inquiries. Had Lu Han’s hair not already been dyed silver, he was sure he would be sporting a headful of grey hair by the end of the day. _I knew I should’ve stayed home._

-

It was with a sad sense of resignation and inevitability that Lu Han found himself standing in front of the K-Café’s newest store after work. He stared at the storefront that was inviting them in with a warm glow and that industrial vintage look that had been on trend for the past few years. His belly churned uneasily; he couldn’t tell if that was Taeyong’s tea or just sheer dread. Either way, Lu Han wished he could expire on the spot.

“Let’s _go_!” Luna urged their small group, tugging on Minseok’s arm with too much enthusiasm. Before he could shy away from her, she hooked her arm around his and tugged. “I’m sure they’re waiting!”

 _That’s what I’m afraid of_ , Lu Han thought, suddenly jealous that Zitao had dragged Taeyong into helping him in another task he’d left until the last minute in true Zitao fashion. If Kris hadn’t persuaded him (with a threatening glare more than with words) that it was _absolutely essential_ for him to attend the party, he would have happily sacrificed his evening to help. His only consolation was that he could probably find a way to escape early since Kris himself had been forced to miss the party for another engagement.

Clenching his eyes closed as he felt Luna pull him along, he heard rather than saw the party envelop them.

For a reasonably small gathering, it was _loud_. Despite living through Zitao and Jongdae’s mayhem regularly, even their trio jumped in surprise at the boisterous laughter coming from behind the café counter. Minseok and Lu Han exchanged looks but, before either could say anything, Luna had already bounced up to the nearest employee for an introduction.

“Hi there! We’re from E-M Group! Mr. Kim and Mr. Oh invited us today.” The woman looked confused for a moment until one of the voices from behind the counter started calling out to them with a tinkling giggle. Excusing themselves with thankful smiles, they left the lady and introduced themselves to the pair — a comical contrast of blond giant and petit brunet — stationed by the coffee machines with grins that suggested that they probably shouldn’t be manning the machines. The image of Zitao and Jongdae flickered in the back of Lu Han’s mind for a moment like a bad omen before he brushed it off and returned their smiles with one of his own as the taller of the two leant over the pastry display case to peer over at them.

“Oh, we know! Birthday Boy couldn’t shut up about it when he came back earlier.” He chuckled in a deep bass. “The name’s Park Chanyeol, and shorty over here is Byun Baekhyun.” The cherubic brunet behind Chanyeol glared and gave him a swift slap to the back that only caused more laughter to gush forth from the other man. “Anyway, no need to be formal. This is a party after all.”

Baekhyun nodded vigorously and gestured to the drinks and desserts around them. “Help yourselves! We may be part of management but we can whip up anything you can think of!” The concoction in his hand that smelled and looked vaguely like a fairy had used it for a bubble bath, and the mischievous twinkle in his eyes certainly left no room for doubt in Lu Han’s mind so he didn’t dare test his claim. “Starbucks ain’t got nothing on us!”

Luna bravely put an order in for a drink that almost rivaled the one in Baekhyun’s hands while Minseok took his time chatting with Chanyeol about the snacks available. In no time, Luna carried the sugary beverage away to mingle with the rest of the party and Lu Han was left to face the full force of Baekhyun’s seemingly boundless energy.

“Now then,” Baekhyun started, the twinkle in his eyes shining ever brighter. “What can I get you?”

Just as he was about to list off their entire menu, a hand tapped Lu Han’s shoulder and an all-too-familiar voice interrupted, “I think Lu Han here has had his fill of sugary drinks. Just give him an Americano — you do still drink that, right?”

Lu Han took a deep breath, fighting the sudden urge to shove Sehun away from him and run away no matter what obligations he had, and looked pointedly ahead, “I’ll get an iced Americano, Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun’s eyes flitted between them for a split second before his face broke into a smile Lu Han certainly did not like and he turned with a sung, “Coming right up!”

Once the brunet’s back was turned, Lu Han shrugged off Sehun’s hand with a huff. He turned his head to the man next to him, a little miffed that he had to tilt up more than he remembered. “Happy birthday, Mr. Oh. Let’s get to work, shall we? Could you tell me a little more about this branch and the two new branches in Seodaemun?”

Sehun looked taken aback for a good second then pursed his lips and nodded. “I’ll walk you through everything after I introduce you to the rest of the team. Don’t worry; none of them bite.” Before Lu Han could refuse, Sehun reached for the glass Baekhyun had just returned with and gently placed it in Lu Han’s hands, his own lingering there a second longer than they should have.

“Shall we?”

 _Unfair._ Lu Han couldn’t help but think, hands feeling warm despite the condensation forming under his fingers. Sehun had barely just re-entered his life and he was already being swayed into his pace just as he had always been — like when study sessions Sehun insisted on having turned into study dates then something _more_ , when they gradually spent less and less time together for Sehun to pursue his goals, when Sehun chose work and new friends over him...

Lu Han abruptly turned toward the group Luna had seamlessly joined earlier, suddenly conscious of Baekhyun’s curious eyes and the lowered volume of Minseok and Chanyeol’s conversation nearby.

“Let’s do this then.” He pretended not to notice Sehun’s pleased grin but, somewhere within him, he could feel the fragile wall he had built around his heart crack at the sight.

The next hour consisted of a flurry of introductions, a mini tour, and taste testing the new items on the menu. By the time Lu Han excused himself to a quiet corner of the café to answer a phone call from Kris, his social battery was drained and his coffee was too diluted for his liking.

“Not in trouble with the boss, are you?”

Pocketing his phone, Lu Han watched Sehun take the seat across from him, glanced back at the group in the middle where Chanyeol was entertaining everyone with some magic trick he’d learnt online, then redirected his eyes down to his coffee. “I just gave him an update on the meeting. We should be able to schedule the photoshoot for the new locations within the next couple of days and I’ll work on the copyrighting for you to review by tomorrow afternoon, give or take. If all goes well, we should be able to roll out at least the preliminary social media ads by the end of the week.”

“Lu Han.” Reluctantly, Lu Han looked up to see Sehun sigh. “ _Relax._ I know you’re technically here for work, but this is still a party and I invited you as a friend.”

Lu Han’s eyebrow raised at his choice of words and this time Sehun looked down at the table, the light blush across his cheeks betraying his emotions. It was oddly reminiscent of the first time they met after the language exchange session — when Sehun had asked him to accompany him to a tea shop and managed to convince him to return after the next one. Lu Han stirred the melting ice cubes in his glass, imagining he could drown the resurfacing memories each time they bobbed below the dark liquid but found that they kept rising like a tide within him as the walls around his heart crumbled under Sehun’s shy glances.

“I…” Sehun started, running a hand through his hair so that some strands came loose from their place. “I know we haven’t really spoken to each other in a while after…” He paused and looked straight at Lu Han, who stiffened under his gaze. “...Everything. But, Lu Han, I took you for granted and I really regret how I acted back then. I tried to contact you loads of times but your phone line was cut and I never got any responses from my emails or Kakaotalk messages. I only found out after asking around that you left. Yixing was ready to beat me up when I asked him.” Sehun laughed dryly when he saw the other grimace at his words. “I don’t blame you. I was an ass — still am for putting you on the spot and forcing you to come here today.”

“Good that you know.” Lu Han muttered gruffly, flattening his palm on the table to stop himself from fidgeting. That plan immediately backfired when Sehun reached out to put his own hand on top of his but, despite jolting up in his seat and the nervous look he cast around the room to check if anyone was looking, Lu Han couldn’t bring himself to pull away.

Taking this as permission, Sehun continued in a whisper, his fingers curling tenderly around Lu Han’s and giving them a light squeeze. “When I saw you the other day at that bar, I thought I was just dreaming again. You haven’t changed one bit. Who would’ve thought I would see you again today, of all days? Even if it’s selfish of me, I needed to talk to you.”

His words appeared to strike something within Lu Han. He peered up at Lu Han in confusion when the other abruptly tugged his hand back as if he was scalded by Sehun’s touch.

“What’s wrong?”

“Sehun…” His brows knitted together and he bowed his head, trying to shield himself from Sehun’s searching gaze. He found himself plucking words from the air, hoping that somehow they would sound more convincing than his heart felt. “We’re not young anymore. You’re 23 now. There’s someone out there for you.”

He bit his lip to stop any more words from spilling out. It would’ve been pointless anyway; in this world, no matter what they did, they wouldn’t be able to escape that truth nor the judgment of many others if they tried. It was cruel that his heart was stuck in the past and, even though the chance to go back was right before him and every fiber of his being was begging to run back into Sehun’s arms, reality was pulling them apart already.

In the midst of this, surprisingly, Sehun chuckled. “Lu Han, I’ve loved you all this time and you’re worried some unknown stranger will come and steal me away after a dream I don’t even see their face in?” They both blushed at the admission but Sehun cleared his throat and continued with conviction in his voice. “I’m not asking you to accept me right away, especially after my fuck up. I want to at least make it up to you as a friend. And if you don’t want to see me anymore then...” He took a deep breath but held his gaze. “I’ll accept that.”

The determination in Sehun’s eyes was palpable and he could feel his heart quiver in his chest. He thought of Jongdae and Liyin, wondered if fate and whatever powers of the universe could really be defied, if happiness really could be grasped with their own hands. The thoughts made his head hurt.

“I- I think I should go.”

A flash of hurt, surprise, and defeat appeared on Sehun’s face as Lu Han stood from his seat, the chair screeching against the floor loudly enough to call the attention of several others in the room.

“Oi, Lu Han, you going already?” called out Chanyeol in that booming voice of his, a trail of tied handkerchiefs still dangling from his sleeve. Sehun flashed him a look that made one of their coworkers near the taller man nudge him with his foot reproachfully.

“Yeah, it’s another long day of work tomorrow. Thank you so much for having us!” Lu Han smiled, giving a polite bow before gesturing to Luna and Minseok, who had started standing from their seats as well. “Oh, don’t let me interrupt your fun!”

Luna looked like she wanted to stay longer but Minseok nudged her reproachfully, and they repeated Lu Han’s apologies and excused themselves as well.

When Lu Han bade him farewell in a small voice, Sehun didn’t try to stop him, though he thought he saw Sehun's hand clench briefly at his side before it came up to pat him on the arm. “Thanks for coming. I’ll email you — for the ad campaign, I mean.”

Lu Han nodded. The slight tremble of Sehun’s voice as he smiled at him then and the warmth of his hand around his earlier seared into his brain, chasing away the insecurities and worries that had been his constant companions, even if just for a night. As the soft pitter-patter of an evening drizzle lulled him to sleep, they buoyed his heart with guarded hope.

-

Lu Han walked into work the next day with Jongdae and Zitao’s grinning faces infiltrating his personal space more than usual. If the Cheshire cat could have transformed into a human and duplicated himself, he was sure his two co-workers fit the bill.

“What is it?” He asked suspiciously, eyes flickering between them.

Zitao, clearly unable to keep silent any longer, let out a shrill giggle. “I don’t know… Why don’t you ask, _Mr. Oh_?”

Lu Han stubbed his toe on an office chair which only prompted the pair to laugh even more. Mentally, he corrected himself — they had to be the evil versions of Tweedledum and Tweedledee instead.

“ _What?_ ”

Taeyong, with his impeccable timing, had just skipped by holding a croissant and a coffee cup with a distinct silver hexagon logo. “Hyung! I left the gift basket and coffee from K-Café Group on your desk for you. I hope you don’t mind me taking one. The note from Mr. Oh said it was for everyone.”

A strangled groan came out of Lu Han’s throat instead of a response.

“I’m sorry! I’ll put it back!”

“No- wait!” Thankfully, he managed to grab Taeyong’s arm before the frightened intern could sprint away. “My toe just hurts. Sorry… Why don’t you save me one before Minseok steals them all? Thanks!”

He waved off the boy before turning back to the snickering pair behind him. “I swear, if either of you say anything — especially to Kris…”

Jongdae gave his signature smile as his hands (very pointedly) curled around a silver-toned coffee cup. “You’re in luck because we didn’t have to! Kris was the one who walked _Mr. Lu-_ I mean Mr. Oh - in himself. I bet Kris’d marry you off himself if you asked.”

The shock on Lu Han’s face and his hurried sweep of the perimeter triggered another round of laughter from Zitao. “ _Relax_ ; he said he was only dropping by because he was on his way to a meeting nearby.”

Lu Han massaged his temples, suddenly feeling exhausted. “I… It’s too early for this. I need a coffee.” He glared at the two when the mere mention of it caused them to snort, and sauntered away before they could torment him any more.

By the time he got to his desk, the basket of pastries was predictably nearly empty and the cardboard carriers were void of coffee cups except for one. “Wow, guys. Thanks.”

“Hey!” Minseok yelled indignantly, though his words were muffled by the danish in his mouth. “We saved you a coffee at least! Not that we had a choice…”

“What do you m-?” He glanced down at the cup he’d just picked up and stopped mid-sentence. On the cup was a note scribbled in Sehun’s tell-tale handwriting, just as messy as he remembered it: _Lu Han, hope I got your order right. OSH._ There was a smudged doodle of a flower next to his signature.

“Cute. But what’s up with the ugly flower?”

The unexpected question next to his ear made Lu Han jump and almost drop the cup in his hand. “ _Holy-!_ ”

Minseok laughed and retreated to his side of the cubicle partition. “My bad, my bad. I’ll leave you to enjoy your love shot then.” He guffawed when Lu Han attempted to swipe at him and hit the partition instead.

Finally left alone, Lu Han stared at the cup in his hand for a few minutes then booted up his laptop to attempt to work. He managed to get through a whole hour before admitting defeat and trudging off to some desolate corner of the office to make a phone call.

“Hi. Lu Han?” Sehun’s voice on the other line was apprehensive.

“Good morning. Am I interrupting something?”

“Not at all! Ah, one sec.” There was a sound of movement and distant conversation on the other line. Lu Han wiped away the condensation on the window beside the seat he settled in, watching the spring rain fall outside until Sehun’s voice came back, breathy as if he’d just run. “Sorry about that. I’m all yours.”

Lu Han coughed, grateful that he was alone at that moment.

“I just sent you a rough draft of the adjusted media plan. Could you take a look and let me know if that works for you? I’m just finishing up on the wording on the social media posts and I’ll send them soon, too.”

“Oh.” He had to cover his mouth to prevent the snicker threatening to come out when Sehun was audibly disappointed. “Uh, right. I’ll get right to it.”

“Thanks for the snacks, by the way.”

“Ah- yeah. I was just in the neighbourhood for a meeting. It’s a gift for working with us. And coming to my birthday.”

“Why is the birthday celebrant the one giving gifts?” He laughed, already picturing Sehun’s flustered face on the other end.

As Sehun stuttered out an excuse, he caught sight of his reflection on the window, eyes bright and shoulders relaxed in a way he hadn’t seen in a while. He paused, chewing on his bottom lip as he thought of Jongdae’s unwavering conviction in his own future and the small flame of hope within him that had been re-ignited by Sehun’s attentions and shy admissions, muffled as if he was still trying to hide them even as the words left his lips. "...And maybe there was a small chance of running into you...."

He watched two droplets from the condensation he'd wiped away on the window pane earlier catch up to each other and merge as one, before continuing with a sudden burst of confidence. “If you ever feel like dropping off more treats, nine thirty is a better time.”

“Huh?”

Lu Han rolled his eyes. He made it so hard to just go for it. “I start work at nine thirty.”

This time, there was a pause on Sehun’s end. “And... your lunch break…?”

Lu Han had to look down because the grin splitting his face on his reflection was a little embarrassing to see himself. “Usually noon. I’ll have to tell Minseok that I can’t get lunch with him though.”

“I’ll find a way to help you persuade him. Chanyeol told me he really liked the tarts and danishes.”

“Sounds perfect.”

-

If not for the change in their appearance and the added responsibilities of becoming a working adult, Lu Han would’ve thought that they really had travelled back in time to the early days of their acquaintance. He found himself meeting Sehun during his lunch breaks the next few days, occasionally getting coffee personally delivered in the morning (always with a short note and a silly flower drawing to accompany it), and humming some song Sehun had linked to him while he worked. When Taeyong pointed out that he seemed more chipper than usual, he decided that he might have “gone for it” a little too hard and tried to rein it in a little. Though it didn’t stop the usual suspects — Zitao and Jongdae — from teasing him everytime he walked in with the tell-tale coffee cup and when they noticed that he was on the phone with Sehun for legitimate work purposes.

“Lu Han, you’ve got crumbs on your face.”

Before he could react, Sehun had already reached over to brush them off, snapping Lu Han’s concentration away from the location shoot they were having at one of the Seodaemun branches. Lu Han stilled by reflex, breath caught in his throat, and Sehun pulled his hand back.

“Sorry. Force of habit.”

The upward quirk of the corner of Sehun’s lips still pulled at his heart even when he tried to resist by thinking of the excited barrage of texts he received from his mother that morning. She almost certainly had started a countdown to his birthday — a countdown to her future in-law and the end of this little fantasy he’d allowed himself to have. While she wouldn’t say anything about the fact that he was with a man, she definitely wouldn’t approve of him being with a man when he was destined to be with someone else. “Bad omen for the future of your marriage,” he could hear her admonish in his head.

When Lu Han didn’t respond, Sehun waved a hand in front of him. “Are you okay? You seem out of it today.”

Sehun made to step closer but Lu Han shook his head. While he had allowed himself to spend all this time (and occasionally flirt) with Sehun despite his better judgment, he had still tried to put some distance between them in a half-hearted attempt to protect himself. It was an ineffective compromise between the will of the universe and his selfish desire to be with Sehun but, with time treacherously ticking towards the inevitable end of this dream, it was all he could do to hold on to these last few days until he was forced to confront reality on his birthday. And though it was obvious that it confused Sehun when he steered the topic away from the past every time Sehun brought it up, the other had silently let it be. Even now, Sehun allowed him to pull back, watching him with a quiet resignation that only made guilt well up to mix with the jumbled emotions within him.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. I told you — or at least I’ve been trying to tell you,” Sehun’s lips twitched up at the corners again. “I want to make it up to you. I want you to feel like you can trust me again. So I’ll wait until you’re ready.”

Suddenly, Taeyong ran over from where he had been watching the shoot, frantically waving his phone in the air, and they looked away from each other, letting the promise hang between them.

“Bad news! The branded travel mugs for the promotional event are going to arrive on Monday instead of tomorrow. Will we be able to pack all the giveaways in time?”

Lu Han frowned. It was bad enough that he had to handle this major promotional event on his birthday, but now he had to prepare all those gifts the day before too. “Minseok is working with the influencers for the event, and Luna’s taking care of the decor that day... but you and I can probably handle a few hundred gift bags.”

“I can come over to help. It’s my project too so I can’t just leave everything to you.” Sehun insisted. The worried look on Taeyong’s face eased slightly. “Just give me a call and I’ll be there.”

Lu Han contemplated Sehun’s words and what the meaning behind the smile that had settled on his face could be, then nodded. If his fantasy was going to end eventually, at least he would have it end while being with him one last time like this.

-

“I think your poor intern is knocked out.”

Lu Han peeked over the mountain of packed bags carefully stacked in boxes on his table and saw Taeyong slumped on his desk, hand still clutching some tissue paper for the bundle of presents in front of him. Without the shuffling of tissue paper filling the empty office, he could hear the quiet snores coming from his direction. He couldn’t help but smile as he walked over to wake him.

Taeyong woke up with a start and immediately began apologizing profusely but Lu Han stopped him with a pat on the head. “It’s late. Don’t worry, we’ll be fine here. There’s not much left.” The boy finally relented when his mentor called a cab for him and wobbled off with a sleepy wave.

“He’s a good kid.” Sehun commented when they were finally alone. “Got a good mentor too.”

Lu Han scoffed. “Flattery isn’t going to make this go any faster.” He looked wearily at the remaining gifts to be packed and stifled a yawn as he sat back down to rest his feet.

“But it will make this more enjoyable.” Sehun shot him a grin. “Besides, it’s true. If I had a mentor like you, I would’ve been much better off. I was so focused on work and getting ahead that I forgot everything else.”

“But I was there.” Sleep was starting to creep up on him and the thoughts in his head that he’d managed to hold back for so long were slipping through his battered defences. He could see the surprise on Sehun’s face even through the fatigue clouding his vision. “You left me alone when I was right there.”

Sehun nodded carefully, eyes darkening in sadness. “You’re right. I convinced myself that you would always be there because you were always too nice to me, and adapting to my crazy schedules and whims. I thought that if I worked super hard at that time, if I did all that networking and extra credit and part-time jobs, I’d be able to get a good job that would let me support you and make you proud of me.” The laugh he let out held no mirth. “I was stupid. Everything I did just chased you away and hurt you instead, and now I’m here packing mugs and coffee blends. So much for all that, huh?”

Brows knitting together, Lu Han tried to shake his head but found that it felt unbelievably heavy. “That’s so lonely...” He mumbled as sleep cocooned him in its embrace. Just as it coaxed his eyes close, he felt the comforting brush of lips on his forehead and a whisper of “it was lonely without you” in his ear like a lullaby.

-

When Lu Han finally woke up, the sun was just starting to rise, its rays reflecting brilliantly off the glass skyscrapers of Seoul’s skyline and against the soft pink canvas of the early morning heavens. He discovered that he felt more rested than he ever had in recent memory, like some weight had been lifted off his shoulders, even though he was currently lying in one of the couches of their office sitting area. He blinked a few times and realised tears were trailing down his face.

He sat up to grab a tissue from the nearby coffee table to wipe them away and saw a single pressed hibiscus lying there with a note. Carefully, he plucked them from the table.

_I will love you for eternity. OSH_

A fresh wave of tears started to trickle from his eyes as his dream played back in his head. If he really concentrated, he could still smell the scent of the early hibiscus blooms that the man he encountered while strolling along Gwanghwamun Plaza had tucked behind his ear. He could feel the burn of pleased embarrassment on his cheeks from the compliment the man had paid before running off to catch up with friends. The man’s face was obscured in his dream, just as everyone had told him to expect, and the dream itself was entirely too short, but it was enough to uncover old memories he had nearly forgotten completely. And now…

He stood up so fast that his head spun. A quick glance around the room gave him the answer he was looking for and he made a beeline for the opposite armchair with no hesitation.

“Sehun…”

The man slouched on the armchair in an uncomfortable angle began to stir as Lu Han gently shook his shoulders. He blinked up at Lu Han, taking in the shy smile illuminated by the rising sun, and reached out to hold the hand that wasn’t carrying the small gifts he had left last night.

“Happy birthday.”

“It was you.”

Sehun nodded, the smile on his face growing. He stood from his seat and Lu Han immediately buried his face in Sehun’s shoulder, melting into his frame and refusing to let go of his hand. “I thought you wouldn’t remember that even after the dream.”

“The mugunghwa tipped me off. You always had a plant in your apartment back then. And those terrible flower doodles.” Lu Han’s voice was muffled but Sehun only curled his arm around the smaller man even tighter.

“Yeah, because it reminded me of you from that day. I never told you about it because it was a little embarrassing.” Lu Han chuckled against Sehun’s collar. “I found out a while back that it’s supposed to mean eternity, and it seemed really appropriate. Even when we were apart and when I thought you would be with someone else, the only one I’ve ever loved and kept going back to... is you.”

Lu Han pulled away enough to stare at him quizzically. “I don’t remember you being this romantic.”

Sehun grinned then ducked down to peck him on the lips. Lu Han shoved him weakly but let him go back for another. “I _did_ say I would try. I didn’t say all those things just because I found out we really were soulmates. Even if there was someone else out there the world says I should be with, to me, there’s only you — always has been you. And everything I have is yours, if you will have me.”

Their eyes locked and tears started to collect at the corner of Lu Han’s eyes. Sehun brushed them away gently.

“And you?” Sehun cupped his face so that the only thing Lu Han could see was the tenderness and sincerity in his eyes. “Lu Han, no matter what that dream says, no matter what I feel, you have a choice. If you need time before you can accept me, or if… if you can’t because of what I did, I’ll understand.”

“I…” Lu Han’s voice quivered as he hesitated, the emotions and thoughts that had haunted him the past few years suddenly racing through his mind, but Sehun’s steady hold on his hand grounded him to the present. To Sehun. “I would be lying if I didn’t say I’m a little scared. I was hurt. It hurt not knowing if you really wanted me there.”

The grip on his hand tightened, but not enough to cause pain. “I’m sorry. Truly.”

Lu Han breathed in, the smell of sandalwood on Sehun washing over him comfortingly. “I’m sorry, too. I was running away — from you, my feelings, and... the thought that someone would easily take my place because the universe willed it. I kept thinking that we drifted apart because we weren’t supposed to be together. But even then... Even though I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from loving you.”

After a second that felt like an eternity to Lu Han, Sehun pulled up the hand he was holding and pressed his lips to Lu Han’s knuckles.

“Then don’t.”

A laugh stumbled its way out of Lu Han’s throat, caught between relief and long harboured emotions. “So sappy,” Lu Han complained, rolling his eyes, but reached out for Sehun with both hands and pulled him down for a kiss.

-

Their peaceful solitude was broken not long after by Taeyong rushing into the office early that morning to help with anything that he wasn’t able to finish the night before. Lu Han felt a little bad that it just happened to be at a time when they happened to be kissing on the couch. The frazzled intern swore himself to secrecy, but they probably should’ve expected that word would spread quickly after their event’s success despite this, especially knowing the type of people around them.

The screen of his phone lit up and Lu Han immediately grabbed it, thankful for an excuse to leave in the middle of Yixing’s tirade about learning the news secondhand from the ever-gossipy Zitao. He’d make it up to him later. For now… His eyes shone brightly upon seeing the name on his screen.

“Hey there.”

“Hey.” He peeked out the window and waved excitedly at the figure looking up at him from under the lamppost at the entrance of their building. The image conjured nostalgic memories of the past and a hopeful view into their future. “I just told my mom earlier. She’s excited to meet you, but even more excited to brag about it to her neighbours.”

Laughter bubbled on the other end and warmth spread in Lu Han’s chest. Both were becoming more and more frequent occurrences in his life.

Destined or not, an eternity with Sehun was something he could finally believe in.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: #313
> 
> Belatedly realising this is not much of a Christmas fic (like at all) but I hope you enjoyed it anyway!


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